Smile

You know there are times in my life where I wonder what I am supposed to be learning, and then I realize that yes in fact life is about learning new things, but it is also about having fun. Right now I am enjoying this having fun time.  When single parenting and dating, I have had to get pretty creative.  At first I thought it would throw a kink in the plans, but it has actually made me get more creative and figure out fun things to do once the boys go to bed.  There have been cooking lessons, rolling up the rug and dancing in the living room, star gazing out back using my phone to tell us what we are looking at.  Fun things that cost little to no money. And the beauty of knowing that my boys are tucked into their beds at a normal time and yet if they wake up needing me I am there to comfort them.  Here are some pictures in random order.

The mischievous TinTin and his gun. This gun was a wonderful investment for him. He hauls it or his "Target toy" everywhere he goes.

Sometimes the boys fall asleep in the car on the way home from taking Hyrum to scouts. I joke that they are on my side making it easy to get them to sleep that night and sometimes dates to start earlier.

Something that I am looking for in the next person that I get serious with is someone who enjoys cooking and helping my pretty basic palate enjoy new foods.  I like flavors of foods, but textures get to me. I know that this is a choice that technically I make to try or not try new foods, but it is fun to have someone who knows their way around the kitchen and who wants to be in there and doesn't expect for food to just be ready every night.  This was dinner last night. It is stuffed chicken breasts.  Note there is green baby spinach inside, red peppers, Gorgonzola cheese, and pecans.  I am not known to eat green foods.  But this chicken was delicious!  And we made extras so I was able to eat it for dinner tonight as well and savor the flavor.  I could definitely get used to this!! I also had squash and couscous.   Who needs restaurants when something this tasty can be made in my own house!!

This is my friend Matt Pruitt from way back in the day.  He went with me to the wedding in Vegas. He was the perfect date because he knew his way around and we had a fun time laughing and joking and I knew that I needn't worry about things going South.

I went out on Friday night when I was in Vegas to an art gallery dinner and then to a party.  My cousin curled my hair and I really liked it. I have yet to be able to reproduce the look on my own, but I am trying to learn.

At the Mandalay Bay after Devin's wedding. Heidi, Matt, and me.  The shoes were super cute but not very practical for walking a few miles in. By the end of the night I carried them as the blisters were not worth the look.

Dinner was at Smith & Wollensky.  By the end of the night I was in a food coma.

This deliciousness is oatmeal fudge bars.  Yet another thing I have made at my house.  Cooking is fun when you do it with a friend!

Heidi & I on our way to the wedding.  I love my sister!  She has been through a lot in her life and yet she is still an amazing example to me of courage and determination in living ones life righteously.  Sometimes I joke with her too much about the wrong subjects but when it comes down to it I am glad she is my sister and that we get to see each other as much as we do.  If she is not working and can find a good deal on tickets or is close enough to drive she is always up for an adventure.  She is awesome!  I love that I can talk to her any time of the day or the night.

This is Brian Bingham.  He is the one who has prepared these tasty meals and been hanging out with me at my house. He has helped me slowly crawl out of my shell that provides protection against all of my many trust issues. He is fun to talk to and not so bad looking on the eyes either.  I am enjoying getting to know this very intelligent, successful man who knows how to joke around and have fun. I don't know how things will end up between us or if they will progress any further....but I am so grateful for the time that I have had to learn that life is good and that it is ok to love myself the way that I am.  There is no rush for anything.  My strengths are my strengths and they make me who I am.  I am glad that I am not a jaded as a result of my divorce.

If you know of any good guys in the Austin, Houston, San Antonio areas that would be good for me to date, let me know. Once school starts this fall, I am going to be very busy.

Oh yes, I am no longer moving far away. I am going to stay here in San Antonio. I have mixed feelings on this but things are working out for me to stay here so in July I will find my own place to live and get settled again in time for school to start. I hope I don't regret this decision in a few months are my boys are exposed to lots of things which I do not agree with when they are with their Father, but at least I still have the option to move if I feel the need.  I am going to trust in the thoughts and impressions I receive in my prayers and keep living my life the best way that I know to and pray that the Lord makes up the difference in my boys lives. I am trying my hardest and know that that is the best that I can do.  I can honestly look back to 10 years ago and know that I would have made the same choices given the chance even with all I know now.  To say I wouldn't would mean that my boys would not be my boys and I would not have the testimony that I have.  I am so thankful that I am where I am not though and single able to make a new life for myself and my kids.  I love to laugh and smile and take care of myself and my boys.  There are days that I struggle when I think of the huge task that it really is, but I just have to break it down to smaller components and then I am not overwhelmed and trust that everything will work out the way that it is supposed to.

I don't have to be anything, I just have to be me.